in the mood for anything...

last night i had a chat with an old friend...
she said she wanted to ask me something, i said go ahead and ask.
she asked if i was or am in love from the period of our first meeting until today
i know what she was hinting at-- i couldn't tell her that i was
she and fwenk are close friends--they treated each other like brother & sister.
instead i told  her a lie--told her i can't be in love-- my heart is shattered, i have just broken up with my bf and my life was falling apart.
i'm not sure if she believed me or not--someday she will find out
but right now i am not ready to tell her.

i cannot explain my feelings--sometimes i think i am abnormal
i'm supposed to be feeling numb after my heartache but
i met fwenk and i felt alive
it wasn't love on a rebound. it was something else.
he was special, and he always will be

i know she knows how i felt
she just want to confirm it
i refuse to take the bait
i'll tell her in my own time